The Inner Space team announces a parent group session on communication with children. In any relationship, we understand what the opposite person thinks and feels about us only through what they communicate to us, verbally and non-verbally. This is perhaps why ‘telling it right’ is very important in a parent-child relationship too.
I just love stories! The role of stories in conveying deeper meanings without appearing like direct instruction is unmatched. In my sessions too, I love citing cases or telling stories.
Zen stories are beautiful, in their simplicity and depth of meaning. Here is a lovely story which characterizes the meanings people attach to all events of life. The way we characterize situations as good or bad for us. It reveals simply the meaninglessness of attaching meanings. Read on and enjoy!
The Inner Space Team announces a group session, ‘The Person behind the Parent’. As a parent you have dropped your children off to classes, therapy sessions, have attended Parent-Teacher meetings, open houses, been called to school to hear complaints or praises, fretted, fumed, stressed and of course loved it to some extent.
Time to love yourself, we say!
Tip 7: Be Mindful
I have spoken about mindfulness before, but I cannot stop raving about the benefits of this simple concept. Mindfulness, as someone said, is about paying extra-ordinary attention to ordinary experiences. Simply put, mindfulness is about being in the present completely and fully.
Happiness is in the ‘now”. What can be a better day than today to let that statement ring loud and clear. Today 10th October is World Mental Health day and the ongoing week is the World Mental Health week. At Inner Space we decided to do something special for this week. We brainstormed and came up with seven most effective suggestions to live a mentally healthier life. Today onwards for the next seven days we will be sharing a tip with you, each day. Hope you enjoy these tips and have your own introspecting sessions.
Finally the Mindfulness Day is here- 12th September 2011! And I have a mindfulness plan.
Since mindfulness is about being in the present moment completely and fully, here are two things I have planned to do today to celebrate mindfulness. I would love it if you, in the privacy of your own spaces and minds join me in whichever suits you. We may not do these everyday, although that is the attempt, but today maybe a start to being mindful…Maybe you will have an entire day of mindfulness someday.
A happy marriage or relationship is where both partners understand each other, love each other unconditionally, communicate effectively and love doing little nothings for each other- so we are told. Those marriages or couples that are not like this are not quite there!
However, we see in our own lives and in lives of those close to us, a number of relationships do not have these qualities. And yet, they last! Some for decades! Ever wondered how is it that without these so assumed ‘basic’ needs, relationships still last?
What happens when what you think does not agree with what you also think?
Whether you are aware of it or not, it happens all the time! That’s the phenomenon sophisticatedly known in psychology as cognitive dissonance. Let’s take an example we knew in our childhood. Haven’t we all heard of the story of the fox and the sour grapes? In the story the fox has two conflicting thoughts: -“the grapes are sweet’. “I cannot have them.”
The fox’s resolution of the conflict is inducing the belief “the grapes are sour”. What the fox technically does is resolves its state of cognitive dissonance because it is too difficult to accept the two conflicting thoughts.
Much as we laugh and scorn at this silly fox, we do similar things all the time.
Why do we suffer? Like a lot of you who would read this, I too ask the same question. Trying to answer that might lead us to an entirely philosophical and spiritual debate, which is not the aim of this piece. However, the question-what is the best way to diminish this suffering seems to often result in one answer-live in the now-in the present moment. This holds merit whether we arrive at it through the Zen or Buddhist path or through the Choice theory and Cognitive therapy path. And yet we find that living in the present is no easy task, although the present is all we have.
Imagine a scenario, where you are an athlete, a runner and you have a coach who is giving you some last minute instructions before the race starts. Which set of instructions are likely to help you?
“Be attentive to all those around you, there are superior runners here. Some have won many such races in the past. They are medalists. Be very attentive to the whistle. Don’t miss it.”
OR
“You have practiced what you could, now enjoy the run. Run freely with your whole mind and body. Don’t worry. Give your best.”
We specialize in combining psychotherapy with deep wellness practices like mindfulness and meditation and creating a customized mental health plan for individuals and organisations.
We specialize in combining psychotherapy with deep wellness practices like mindfulness and meditation and creating a customized mental health plan for individuals and organisations.
A young woman from another country moved with her family to live for one year in a town near the monastery. When, in the course of the year she discovered the monastery, she would periodically visit to have discussions with the Abbess. The Abbess introduced her to meditation, which became very meaningful for the young woman.
When the family’s year-long stay was drawing to an end, the young woman asked the Abbess, “In my country there is no Buddhism and no one has even heard about meditation. How can I continue to learn and deepen the practice you have started me on?”
The Abbess said, “When you return home ask far and wide for who, among the wise people, is recognized as having the greatest ability to listen. Ask that person to instruct you in the art of listening. What you learn about listening from such a person will teach you how to further your meditation practice.
― Gil Fronsdal, A Monastery Within: Tales from the Buddhist Path
