Mindful eating is a mindfulness exercise that sounds too simple to be true. Just think about it, “How can eating be mindful? And how can mindful eating help me in any way?” Let’s try to figure out ways in which food can be helpful in being more than just nutritious.
Hi! Time for the next mindfulness technique – breathing meditation, or breath meditation.
This is an exercise that perhaps most of you may be familiar with. Typically it is called meditation through awareness of the breath. It’s the initial and simplest form of meditation.
HOW TO BE MINDFUL : EXERCISE 2 – BREATHING MEDITATION Read More »
The Mental Health week 2012 is here and just as last year (We highlighted 7 most effective Mental health tips during mental health week 2011), this year again we have a post a day lined up for you for all the seven days.
The theme we have decided to focus upon this time is mindfulness exercises, to help you understand how to be mindful. So every day, for a week starting from today, you will have one technique, one practice or exercise that you can reflect upon and attempt to enhance the joy of just living-mindfully.
HOW TO BE MINDFUL? – EXERCISE 1: AWARENESS OF THE PRESENT Read More »
Some of you in your relationships may be in a situation where one partner wants or wishes for sex much lesser than the other partner. We’ve written an article that extensively describes low sexual desire – what contributes to it and what one can do about it.
DEALING WITH LACK OF SEXUAL DESIRE : WORKING TOWARDS A HAPPIER RELATIONSHIP Read More »
A classmate of mine in school and college successfully hung herself from a fan… It was devastating… Years later here I am-a psychologist- with several hundred sessions of having heard the teenagers side of the story-the hopelessness, helplessness and the frustrations. When Rediff asked me to write about teenage suicide, everything came together 🙂
UNDERSTAND TEENAGE SUICIDE: GET INTO THEIR SHOES Read More »
Marriages today are under duress and we all know that. The statement has been true for the past decade or so for a number of countries and India follows suit. The number of couples I see for therapy have at least quadrupled in the last decade.
INDIAN MARRIAGE: STRAINED BY CHANGING WOMEN’S ROLES? Read More »
If you are easily upset, angry or worried, chances are that you often try to control your emotions but they just burst forth, drenching and even drowning you in their strong gush. We all have those moments when we feel like we just cannot deal with our feelings and life seems just too much to cope with. Everything from the demanding boss to the rebellious child to the overcrowded trains gets to you, rubbing you in all the wrong ways and you find yourself losing your cool. How would you rather like to be? We would all like to be stronger and know better how control our anger. I’m sure that’s what you try to do every time too. However, more often than not, controlling anger is something that is easier said than done. How easy is it to keep calm and be rational when you feel like breaking things and screaming out or when you’re in the middle of a nervous breakdown? Managing Anger by Recognizing your ‘Triggers’ : A Step by Step Technique The first requirement in order to control anger better is knowing yourself better. You can then apply this knowledge and understanding to make life easier. A very important and often overlooked aspect of learning to manage anger is understanding what it is that makes this management difficult in the first place. What is it that is agitating you so much? We all have triggers, those sore/touchy spots which always manage to rile us, so we need to learn to work our way through them. Imagine yourself covered with a whole lot of buttons. Whenever anyone pushes one of these it triggers a strong emotional reaction and you end up reacting badly, losing control. Dealing with this sensitivity would be a 3 step process: 1. Identify your triggers : What makes you Angry? Doing the following exercise on paper would greatly help. Think back to the last few times you had an angry outburst and note: – What caused it? – What happened before it? What were the events leading upto it? – What else happened that day? – Who were the people involved in the conflict? – How were u feeling? Even if u cannot remember about the previous episodes, start making this list for the next few weeks. Patterns will emerge, providing you insight and access to your buttons. 2. Avoid your triggers So now that you have identified what it is that irritates you so much, work your way around it. If the traffic gets on your nerves, leave early. You can use the extra time to finish pending work or catch up on your reading. If being late makes you anxious and irritable, learn to be punctual and avoid procrastinating. You will be able to keep your cool much more if you are relaxed. If it is your partner’s tendency to nag which is upsetting you, talk to him/her about it. Try to solve the issue. If your wife or parent is repeatedly asking you to get a task done, just finish it in the first time so you don’t have to listen to it again and again, you know you’re going to have to do it eventually. 3. Address Deeper Emotional Problems If your anger seems to be stemming from deeper emotional issues, it needs to be addressed properly. If you see yourself getting angry when people don’t listen to you or don’t do as you want, check if you’re feeling disrespected or powerless. If you detest being told what to do, check for issues with authority. Do you find yourself thinking like ‘they always do this’, ‘he just doesn’t care’ or ‘why should I care when she doesn’t’? Most likely, you are storing past emotional hurt which gets relived on these occasions. It’s best to tackle such issues head on so they don’t have the power to affect you so much. While you can try to figure it out with a friend, guidance from elders in the family or even a counselor would help you greatly. Your triggers may have contributed to your difficulties controlling anger. However, recognizing and dealing with them, patiently and with perseverance, can build your inner emotional strength, helping you handle anger healthily. Post contributed by: Mahima Gupta (Psychologist, Inner Space, 2010-2012).
RECOGNIZING YOUR TRIGGERS : A TECHNIQUE TO CONTROL ANGER Read More »
Why is it Important to Understand Feelings ? Many of us often wonder how to make our relationships more harmonious. We probably even zero-in on communication in a relationship as one key aspect to be worked upon. However, we are often unclear as to what in communication we need to improve. Sadia Saeed, in a lucid write-up on the ‘women’s web’ site, explains what is perhaps one of the most important pre-requisites of a healthy relationship – ‘understanding the other’s feelings”‘. We build relationships as we like to feel connected to others. We seek security and affection out of our relationships. Most importantly, we seek in relationships to be understood. Often, a relationship we are unhappy in is one where we don’t feel understood. Taking a cue from this, we also need to communicate to the opposite person that we understand them. We need to acknowledge that his/her problems, feelings, fears and expectations are important, even if they conflict with ours. This could be difficult to do at first. However, if done, it can ease significantly the friction in a relationship. This process of feeling understood and understanding feelings -of feeling validated and validating is an extremely important part of communication in any relationship. To know how we can both give and ask for validation please read the article “What Does it Mean to Validate Feelings” by Sadia Saeed. Post contributed by: Malini Krishnan about the author share this blog! read similar blogs WHY WE FEEL MISUNDERSTOOD Often, when we feel overwhelmed in our day to day… Read More Inner Space TeamNovember 30, 2015 EXTRAMARITAL AFFAIRS: PART I-WHY DO PEOPLE CHEAT IN RELATIONSHIPS? As time goes by, the dynamics of marriage as an… Read More Inner Space TeamJune 19, 2014 FEELING STUCK? WHAT CAN YOU DO AS A FIRST STEP? Sometimes, we feel stuck in a situation. We feel like… Read More Sadia SaeedNovember 23, 2012 WHY MARRIAGES AND RELATIONSHIPS WORK INSPITE OF PROBLEMS A happy marriage or relationship is where both partners understand… Read More Sadia SaeedJuly 21, 2011
Some of us in our teens are ‘cool under pressure’, ‘cool as a cucumber’ or ‘chilled out’. Some of us are hot-tempered, short-tempered or easily angered. If you are one of those who identify with the second set of descriptors, life could get a tad bit difficult. Losing one’s cool is never a pleasant feeling. You may get persistently described as short-tempered, stubborn and argumentative. Moreover, over a period of time, others almost stop bothering to find out why you are angry and what has hurt you. Its almost like, ‘this chap/girl is forever angry so forget it.’ At such a time it may start to feel like people are just mocking you or they just don’t care….and wait, its not over yet.
Why don’t you ever listen?
You just don’t understand me!
Why are you always late?
You must study or you won’t score well
You are of no help at all!
You are so insensitive, you just don’t care, you don’t love me!
Are these statements you have faced at one time or the other? How did it make you feel? How did you respond to it? Did it make you want to listen and cooperate? Or did it feel like an accusation?
We specialize in combining psychotherapy with deep wellness practices like mindfulness and meditation and creating a customized mental health plan for individuals and organisations.
We specialize in combining psychotherapy with deep wellness practices like mindfulness and meditation and creating a customized mental health plan for individuals and organisations.
A young woman from another country moved with her family to live for one year in a town near the monastery. When, in the course of the year she discovered the monastery, she would periodically visit to have discussions with the Abbess. The Abbess introduced her to meditation, which became very meaningful for the young woman.
When the family’s year-long stay was drawing to an end, the young woman asked the Abbess, “In my country there is no Buddhism and no one has even heard about meditation. How can I continue to learn and deepen the practice you have started me on?”
The Abbess said, “When you return home ask far and wide for who, among the wise people, is recognized as having the greatest ability to listen. Ask that person to instruct you in the art of listening. What you learn about listening from such a person will teach you how to further your meditation practice.
― Gil Fronsdal, A Monastery Within: Tales from the Buddhist Path
