Inner Space

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inner self

TO THAT WHICH IS BEAUTIFUL IN YOU

You are able to live with yourself because you know you are fundamentally good!

You know that all your inadequacies and the not so good qualities exist either because they are judged that way by people around you or because you picked them up somewhere on the way because of the difficulties that life sent your way.

You are correct! The deepest core of you, of all of us, every person is beautiful.

Is it okay to say no in the face of a temper tantrum?

IS IT OKAY TO SAY NO IN THE FACE OF A TEMPER TANTRUM?

This is a question I am often asked by parents in therapy.

‘How to react if the child throws a temper tantrum?’

If you are a parent, you probably have been through this dilemma and resolved it. Or maybe you are going through it at present.

Some children find it easier to adjust when things don’t go their way. They may occasionally cry or fuss a little, but they’re largely open to adjusting.

Some children find it extremely difficult to make such an adjustment. They tend to get very upset when things don’t go their way. They may cry loudly, shout and insist that their demand be met with. The more you deny them what they want, the more they cry and the temper tantrum aggravates. Ultimately, you reach a place where you don’t know how to react.

In such a scenario, what is better? To fulfill the child’s demand or say no?

Advantages of Nuclear Family

NUCLEAR FAMILIES – AN ADVANTAGE FOR CHILDREN?

I often come across parents of nuclear families these days that are juggling between work, home, and baby- sitters. They constantly ponder about the fact that their children would be raised better in the hands of their family members or grandparents versus a baby- sitter, or a care- taker. So are we blaming the changing …

NUCLEAR FAMILIES – AN ADVANTAGE FOR CHILDREN? Read More »

Rise in teenage suicide in India

UNDERSTAND TEENAGE SUICIDE: GET INTO THEIR SHOES

A classmate of mine in school and college successfully hung herself from a fan… It was devastating… Years later here I am-a psychologist- with several hundred sessions of having heard the teenagers side of the story-the hopelessness, helplessness and the frustrations. When Rediff asked me to write about teenage suicide, everything came together 🙂

Holding Hands

CONSISTENCY IN PARENTING : AN ASPECT OF BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION

Most parents seek guidance on how they can change the negative behavior of their children and encourage more positive behavior. We have held two workshops at Inner Space focusing on behavior modification addressing these concerns. Behavior modification is the process applied to enable the child and parents to methodically bring about the required changes. It involves setting up rules of actions and consequent positive or negative repercussions. Positive behavior gets rewards while negative behavior gets no rewards.

This is also what we often do in life naturally. However, more often than not we do it inconsistently.

PARENT GROUP SESSION ON COMMUNICATION WITH CHILDREN

The Inner Space team announces a parent group session on communication with children. In any relationship, we understand what the opposite person thinks and feels about us only through what they communicate to us, verbally and non-verbally. This is perhaps why ‘telling it right’ is very important in a parent-child relationship too.

Preserving the parent child relation

PRESERVING THE PARENT-CHILD RELATIONSHIP

As parents, we are naturally concerned about our children. We want them to have a bright future and be self sufficient. Anything that we see as taking the child away from this prospect worries us. We worry, fret and spend considerable time and energy correcting the child. “Don’t do this, it’s bad for you.” “Why don’t you listen to me?”, “I’m saying this for your good and nobody else’s!!” are some statements you would probably connect with. At times, we happen to spend ALL our time with the child in correcting him/her. We consider it our duty to mould them right. Hence, many of us would be constantly on the lookout for the negative behavior, be it disinterest in studies, lack of social interaction, excessive viewing of television, argumentativeness or aggression. Every repetition of that behavior frustrates us and we chide and scold our children or maybe even beat them. However, a good number of times, our child continues to engage in the negative behavior. Therefore, is the current approach you are using effective? What is going wrong here?

Traditional Play

THE IMPORTANCE OF TRADITIONAL PLAY

Play. A word that is synonymous with setting the mind free, using imagination and almost creating a new world. However, today, we are increasingly turning to electronic games to fill in most of our play time. Video games and the like are certainly entertaining and stimulating. With advanced technology and thrilling effects, they sure give us an adrenaline rush! However, forms of conventional or traditional play can also offer us a number of psychological benefits in addition to physical benefits. We could be missing out on a world of good that our good old indoor board games, outdoor games and imaginative play could do to us. Wonder how? Let’s explore.

Child Depression

IS YOUR CHILD DEPRESSED?

Depression can affect children as well.

Many of us would feel that this is just a child, how can he/she be depressed? Perhaps it’s just a mood swing or a phase. Yes, that happens too. Not every child who seems sad or introverted is depressed. But if you notice a significant change in your child’s behavior, which he just doesn’t seem to be ‘getting over’ and is adversely impacting his school work and/or relationships, perhaps it’s time to pay attention.

Safety tips

COMMUNICATING SAFETY TIPS TO CHILDREN

Given the fast paced life we all lead, it is a tad too difficult to supervise our children the way our parents probably did. They need to be more independent and therefore need to be aware of all the do’s and don’ts of daily life, especially those pertaining to safety. While this is of paramount importance, it is equally important to provide a balanced perspective of safety to our children.
What I mean to say is we need to guard against communicating to the child that ‘the world is an unsafe place’ and that ‘people are all out to take advantage of you.’ If the child adopts any such belief, it may lead to emotional turmoil which could manifest in anxiety and apprehension, separation anxiety and clinginess or a refusal to be alone. Let us understand better how this happens:

The Art of Listening

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