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Four

WE TURN FOUR!

This year on the 26th of December Inner Space turns four.

This post is always my favorite post of the year because I ritually sit down with a nice cup of tea and I can indulge myself in reminiscing about all the wonderful people I saw in therapy, about their movement and growth, about all the work we put in as a team, the activities we did and all the articles we wrote thinking of all of you who read this space regularly.

This time however, I do this with a heavy heart. The deaths of so many children in Peshawar  leaves me feeling completely uneasy. It is often easy to judge, find someone or something to blame and then move on but I am finding it difficult to do any of this. This time as I write to you I need to stay with this dissonance  of holding within me simultaneously, the gaiety of the ending year, the joy of completing four years and the agony of a world where the death of children is the price we have to pay to live.

As therapists, we get to see firsthand the strife that society is going through: overworked people, struggles that relationships are facing, aging parents that feel lonely, children that feel burdened with their parent’s expectations and anxieties and people who feel lost just going through day to day life. We get to see those who are made out to be culprits and those who feel like victims. In the last 14 years of my practice, I have only seen the populace at large get unhappier. And a lot of this unhappiness seems motivated by the fear of not surviving well enough and the fear of losing out.

Perhaps, we have been involved in the struggle for our own survival for too long. Maybe it’s time to widen that circle of loved ones. Maybe it’s time to see that everyone survives, even those with whom we may have ideological differences or disagreements.

And the smallest way in which we can do it is to not judge, to freely allow ourselves to feel and care for fellow human beings and to unconditionally love. With more rapes in our neighborhood and more terrorism in the world, I am more convinced than ever before that the more guarded we get the more we isolate others. We have a hurt, wounded world and it is up to us to have a more compassionate response towards it.

If survival of the fittest is the policy we will live by, then 132 children will never be fit enough to survive armed terrorists.  This is the world we are choosing to create in our struggle for survival and this is the world we can change in our own small way.

This year let’s decide to fear less- even if we may be in the way of harm- and love more, even if it doesn’t get reciprocated.

As a ritual I’m sharing with you some of the work we did this year:

Expert Articles by the Team:

Every month, we meet for team meetings.  We realized during our discussions that each psychologist in the team has a different but equally insightful perspective on topics. So, we decided to start writing articles as a team, picking topics that we felt were relevant and helpful. The team discussions were very thought-provoking for us as well. These expert articles cover a wider range and aim to give you a detailed understanding of the topic:

Coping with the Psychological Effects of Traumatic News: Almost every day, we come across news of murder, assault, rape, and thievery, whether it is in the newspaper, on news channels or through various online media websites. Some people seem to cope with these news reports, some find it difficult to assimilate it. Through this article we explained the psychological effects of traumatic news and how we can build healthy coping strategies to deal with these effects.

Extramarital Affairs: As therapists, we often work with people who are either themselves involved in an extramarital affair or have spouses who are involved. No matter what the situation, a common underpinning is a great deal of stress in both partners. Through a 3-part series, we shared our insights about extramarital affairs:

Extramarital Affairs: Part I – Why Do People Cheat In Relationships?

Extramarital Affairs: Part II – What To Do When You Are Having An Affair?

Extramarital Affairs: Part III – What To Do If Your Spouse Has Had An Affair?

Activities & Workshops: In the Mindfulness Space

This year, we tried earnestly to reach out to as many people as possible and share the concept and practice of Mindfulness. We continued holding Basic and Advanced Mindfulness Workshops, just like in 2013. Additionally, 2014 has also been a year of some new endeavors.

– Basic and Advanced Mindfulness Workshops These workshops are part of the Integrated Mindfulness Program:

‘Feel Centered with Mindfulness” is our basic mindfulness training program that encourages a mindful perspective for dealing with thoughts , emotions, struggles and in general for better mental health and overall well being. We started these sessions in May 2013 and they have been a regular feature ever since. The Advanced Mindfulness Workshop is Level II of this program. This workshop focuses on thoughts and mindfulness of thoughts, deeper work with the mind-body connection and emotions.

– Art and Mindfulness Mindfulness is all about being in the present. Tuning out the intellectual judgmental left brain to see what we really are about. What we really feel. Art is also all about right brain functioning and therefore deeply connected to our creativity, daydreaming and emotions. Art therefore is a wonderful doorway through which one can mindfully enter the realm of their existence at this moment to feel connected with oneself. We explored this doorway through a workshop:-

Mindful Art Workshop We conducted a workshop based on art and mindfulness, where the focus was on connecting with oneself, in the moment, and intuitively expressing oneself through doodles, drawings and colors. This was a novel and refreshing experience for all of us!

We also got together as a team and did a beautiful team art therapy exercise, lead by our therapist Kunjal Shah. Sharing some snippets with you – Group Art Therapy: Our Team Activity

The Meditation Class We started a bi-monthly meditation class September 2014 onwards. We felt that an ongoing class would help people stay in touch with the practice and understand different nuances of mindfulness and meditation better.

Blogs of 2014

Finally, we are also sharing with you our blog posts in 2014. As always, this is a mix of articles on children, adolescents, mental health, and not to forget – mindfulness!

Is Your Child Just Lazy? Or Do They Have ADHD?

Does Social Media Play A Positive Role in Your Teenager’s Life?

Body Image Issues in Adolescence: How Can You Develop a Positive Body Image?

Choosing Not To Have Children: What It Could Mean For You

It is Just An Intrusive Thought! – Dealing with Guilt in Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

Mindfulness Through the Senses

This has been quite a trip down memory lane! It makes us very happy to do our best to serve, reach out, and not to mention, learn. Every year, or for that matter, every day brings about so much learning, it keeps us going!

We thank each and every one of you for being a part of our journey – through your enquiries, questions, sharings and support 🙂

Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy Happy New Year!

 Image Credit: Kathryn Rotondo

6 thoughts on “WE TURN FOUR!”

  1. Diwali Bhanudas Suryaji

    Hi Saeeda
    We are staying in Bahrain and planning to come India in December for short vacation.
    We are interested to do counselling for our 12 year old son.

    He is very good in academic but suddenly started loosing interest in studies. When we r asking him to study forcefully he will sit. He is getting angry for small things. He is making silly mistakes in test but he don’t bothered for that. It is possible I can give us appointment for him. We are coming India on 10th December Thank you

  2. Congratulations to the Inner Space team! Diligence and insight along with a deep sense of ethics is what makes Inner Space a professional service, and hats off to Sadia Raval for ensuring continuous growth in her team with no compromise in quality. May you only grow stronger! 🙂

  3. Sadia & team … what great work you are doing!
    FOUR YEARS already — wow! Congratulations , and may you continue to guide & touch many lives.
    Marga

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