Inner Space

negative thoughts

When you make peace with something, it bothers you less

WHY ACCEPT A PROBLEM?

What’s common between a daughter-in-law devastated by her mother-in-laws behaviour, a man who cannot bear the boredom of his work anymore, a parent who is terribly stressed because his child refuses to study, a man who cannot believe he has lost his wife so suddenly, and a woman who is overwhelmed because she has been diagnosed with breast cancer?

As I see it, a few things …

The situation is grave
It has taken the joy out of life
Most of the day and sometimes a good part of the night is spent in thinking about the problem and thinking how to resolve it
A sense of being stuck, and trapped- a feeling that I cannot get out of this…

Do you feel like this about some situation of your life?

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Happiness

A Short Story On Happiness

Here is a special story that shows us how we identify with happiness. Its a short Sufi, Middle-Eastern story taken from here. The Sack Mulla came upon a frowning man walking along the road to town. “What’s wrong?” he asked. The man held up a tattered bag and moaned, “All that I own in this wide world barely fills this miserable, wretched sack.” “Too bad,” said Mulla, and with that, he snatched the bag from the man’s hands and ran down the road with it. Having lost everything, the man burst into tears and, more miserable than before, continued walking. Meanwhile, Mulla quickly ran around the bend and placed the man’s sack in the middle of the road where he would have to come upon it. When the man saw his bag sitting in the road before him, he laughed with joy, and shouted, “My sack! I thought I’d lost you!” Watching through the bushes, Mulla chuckled. “Well, that’s one way to make someone happy!” How To Be Happy? Most people coming to me for therapy obviously come with some immediate concern at hand. However innately they appear to be holding the same question in their hearts as all of you who read this perhaps also do. ” How to be Happy?”. Some part of any counselling process often gets dedicated to helping people identify the happiness that is already there in their lives, in the present, and to experience it for what it is worth. As the story shows, Happiness is not a distant bird somewhere in some bush. It is often perching right upon our own shoulder. Often we fail to recognize it unless it flies away or as in the above case case, gets taken away. I wish all of you who read this a pleasant discovery of this already existing happiness, at least for today. Read Our Free E Book, ‘First Few Steps To Mindfulness’ Join our community now! Click here About the Author This article was written by Sadia Saeed, Chief Counsellor and Founder of Inner Space. This post was consulted & approved by professional therapists practicing online therapy and counseling.  Ask a Therapist If you are interested to know more about anxiety disorders and other mental health topics, ‘Ask A Therapist’ is a platform for you to ask your questions related to Mental Health, Mindfulness & Emotional Well-Being to our team of qualified Therapists. Ask a Therapist Related Blogs Why Am I Feeling Sad? : A Guide On Understanding And Accepting Sadness How To Use Mindfulness During Stressful Situations What is Anxiety?

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self growth

JUST FOR TODAY – BEGINNING THE PROCESS OF SELF GROWTH

Become the person that you want to be…one day at a time.

We all have an image of our ideal self, the kind of human being we would like to be, of the kind of life we would like to live. But more often than not, reality has a different plan for us. No matter how much we want to be the tranquil, equanimous, all-accepting, ever-blissful Buddha, somehow we end up being the angry, frustrated and anxious poor Joe instead.

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cup of coffee

PUTTING THINGS DOWN

This is a small story, holding a big message.. Hope It Inspires You 🙂

A Professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it.
He held it up for all to see & asked the students “How much do you think this glass weighs?”
’50gms!’….. ‘100gms!’ …..’125gms’ …the students answered.
“I really don’t know unless I weigh it,” said the professor, “but, my question is:
What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?”
‘Nothing’ …the students said.
‘Ok what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?’ the professor asked.
‘Your arm would begin to ache’ said one student.
“You’re right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?”
“Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis & have to go to hospital for sure!” … Ventured another student & all the students laughed
“Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?” Asked the
professor.

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daydreaming

EXCESSIVE DAYDREAMING

Your day starts with a mild stir. A stir nowhere else but in your mind. As you go about your daily chores, you feel like your mind is only partially involved. A simultaneous series of thoughts are on too. Your imagination is rolling and how! You imagine yourself giving a stage performance, that boy you like finally making conversation with you, you topping in class or bagging that coveted project….. you are daydreaming. Why are we discussing this? Isn’t daydreaming one pleasant escapade that is safe? Oh yes, it is! However, there are some of us who daydream excessively, so much so that our schedules are delayed or disrupted or our head begins to feel heavy. We probably end up underachieving or simply being dissatisfied with this almost compulsive tendency…yet, it has its own rewards. Let’s understand this better.

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Competition

THE EFFECTS OF UNHEALTHY COMPETITION

Competition. A word that fuels energy, action, persistence….nervousness, impulsivity…selfishness, anger & conflict? Disruption of Relationships? Or in some cases, intense turmoil to a person’s psyche?
Well, yes. Yes to all these questions.

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Kindness

KINDNESS: MORALITY OR A WAY TO MENTAL HEALTH?

Be Kind. Not just because it makes you look good, but primarily because it makes you ‘feel’ good. I would understand kindness as helping another person, in any way you can, without expecting anything in return. Kindness is not defined in magnitude, but only the purity of intent. Be it giving tons of money to charities or helping an old person cross the street – it’s all equally important and significant.

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Jealousy

DEALING WITH JEALOUSY IN FRIENDSHIP

Jealousy is a difficult emotion to deal with. It becomes that much more difficult however; when we’re jealous of a close friend, who we also love. Two opposite emotions – affection and jealousy clash…and perhaps leave us agonized. The closer we are to the friend, the worse it could get. Every time we meet the friend, we’re reminded of how he/ she is better than we are…and how we are not good enough. Leaving the situation unaddressed could prove detrimental to the friendship, to our emotional well being or to both

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Overthinking

HOW TO STOP THINKING EXCESSIVELY: OVERTHINKING PART II

Most of us have experienced or rather suffered rumination at some time, either temporarily or more chronically. Hence, we are here reading more about it. Now that we have understood what rumination is and why it doesn’t work for us more clearly, how do we stop this process?

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Disadvantages of Overthinking

WHY THINKING A LOT DOESN’T HELP: OVERTHINKING-PART I

Some people complain that “I just can’t seem to think” but a larger number, perhaps, find themselves trapped because they just can’t stop thinking! They find themselves thinking all the time – while watching TV, while working, eating and even in sleep! Psychology has a name for it. Rumination.

Rumination is the process of pondering or thinking over something repetitively. It’s pretty much like a cow chewing over her food incessantly. Where rumination may help the cow’s health, it isn’t really helpful for our mental health.

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The Art of Listening