The way you were brought up, the experiences you had with your parents and even your peer groups play a very important role in shaping you. You may have some complaints about your parents. You may even have some grudge against your parents that has stayed with you for years. Maybe your parents did not …
I often come across parents of nuclear families these days that are juggling between work, home, and baby- sitters. They constantly ponder about the fact that their children would be raised better in the hands of their family members or grandparents versus a baby- sitter, or a care- taker. So are we blaming the changing …
As parents, we are naturally concerned about our children. We want them to have a bright future and be self sufficient. Anything that we see as taking the child away from this prospect worries us. We worry, fret and spend considerable time and energy correcting the child. “Don’t do this, it’s bad for you.” “Why don’t you listen to me?”, “I’m saying this for your good and nobody else’s!!” are some statements you would probably connect with. At times, we happen to spend ALL our time with the child in correcting him/her. We consider it our duty to mould them right. Hence, many of us would be constantly on the lookout for the negative behavior, be it disinterest in studies, lack of social interaction, excessive viewing of television, argumentativeness or aggression. Every repetition of that behavior frustrates us and we chide and scold our children or maybe even beat them. However, a good number of times, our child continues to engage in the negative behavior. Therefore, is the current approach you are using effective? What is going wrong here?
Coping and dealing with a child who has a developmental difficulty requires patience, understanding and firm inner resilience, which is why it is referred to as being relatively difficult. It takes us time to understand the nature of our child’s barriers to growth and then help them. But, what about a situation where we probably do not understand fully that our child is facing genuine barriers to growth?? What about when we attribute their problem behavior to their personalities and miss out on recognizing a mild form of a developmental disturbance?? This blog muses about these possibilities.
Imagine a scenario, where you are an athlete, a runner and you have a coach who is giving you some last minute instructions before the race starts. Which set of instructions are likely to help you?
“Be attentive to all those around you, there are superior runners here. Some have won many such races in the past. They are medalists. Be very attentive to the whistle. Don’t miss it.”
“You have practiced what you could, now enjoy the run. Run freely with your whole mind and body. Don’t worry. Give your best.”