People often seek therapy when they feel powerless in face of difficulties, in order to regain a sense of control. Therapy, however, is also a process of moving towards deep self-awareness. In the Allegory of the Cave, Plato describes how a person who is restrained in a dark cave for his entire life would feel when unchained and let out in the light of the sun for the first time. The counselling process, therefore, is not just as a ‘road to recovery’ but also a ‘path to self-realisation’.
how to change self
Do you feel like you have no energy left to deal with the stresses of your job? Or, for that matter, your life? That you just ‘can’t take this anymore’? If you do, you are probably experiencing burnout.
At times, burnout goes unnoticed for long or gets addressed very late. By the time, the fatigue and distress the person experiences take a toll. How do you know if you are going through this?
Take a moment. Think about something you really want to do, but haven’t yet because you are afraid it might not work out:
Taking up that new project at work. Starting your own homemade cupcakes business. Shifting to a new house. Starting a fitness regime. Investing in some property. Taking a break from work to travel. Telling that someone special you love them.
Your mind is probably telling you: What if it doesn’t work out? What if it is a big mistake? What if I fail? Sometimes, when you want to take up something new, your mind will tell you that you are not ready, even if you are. Yes, taking up something new does come with changes and some amount of risk but it also comes with a gamut of exciting possibilities.
When you are scared to fail, you take a step back. You colour inside the lines. This fear limits you from attempting certain activities, taking risks and you start to undermine your potential.
Everyone wants to know what their strengths are – what they are good at, what situations they can pull-off well and what about them helps them cope better with life.
‘Strengths’ of any person are unique. Even if two people have the same strength, for example, good communication skills, the way each person’s communication skills show up in life would be very very different.
Sometimes, it is this unique nature of strengths that makes it difficult for you to truly identify what your strengths are. You probably think – ‘God, he’s so effective with customers’, or, ‘She’s so good with conversation!’ when you notice others.
The New Year has begun! Every new year brings along with it the vibe of a fresh start and of new beginnings. Perhaps, that’s how the whole idea of new year ‘resolutions’ came in. The philosophy behind resolutions seems to be to infuse us with freshness and zeal , to make one change that will see us being happier and healthier in the next year. Some of you may have made your resolutions and are probably trying to keep up with them. Many of us, throughout the year, attempt to form new habits or to break old ones. Both forming and breaking habits involve a whole lot of psychological connotations. For now, let’s pick one habit that many of us share a love-hate relationship with – a food habit. Just about any food habit. Be it a tendency to reach for the chocolate bars as soon as you reach home or munching on fries and wafers for hours together. The importance of eating healthy and caring about food habits stares us in the face everyday, through newspapers, the internet and somewhere, even through our own bodies. What does it take to break an unhealthy food habit? To deal with a craving for food? ‘Self-control’ is what intuitively comes to mind.
Become the person that you want to be…one day at a time.
We all have an image of our ideal self, the kind of human being we would like to be, of the kind of life we would like to live. But more often than not, reality has a different plan for us. No matter how much we want to be the tranquil, equanimous, all-accepting, ever-blissful Buddha, somehow we end up being the angry, frustrated and anxious poor Joe instead.
We all have dreams. We have a multitude of wishes. Most of us want a life that is at least a little if not very different from the one we’re living now. A better brighter reality. There’s a lot that we want, but unfortunately don’t always manage to achieve. Why so? Why don’t dreams turn into reality?
To create the reality that we want, we first need to dream it. You can’t consciously create what you can’t imagine.
The first and perhaps the most crucial step in achieving what you want is understanding what it is that you really want. Sounds simple to the extent of being silly does it?